Suprise!

When Lexi was 16 months old I found out I was pregnant with Caden. This was an unplanned gift. I was overwhelmed with only Lexi. We could now keep her happy at home with constant attention but I had to work hard to avoid anything that would upset her because once she got upset there was no going back.

We were told it was unlikely what happened with Lexi would happen again but just to be safe I would be considered high risk and get extra careful monitoring. Even with these assurances I was scared through my whole pregnancy because Lexi was a healthy baby until the very end. To this day I have fears for the people I love who are pregnant. I am always surprised when things go right even though I know that is way more common than something going wrong.

We had a lot to figure out. We lived in a two bedroom apartment and I didn't know how anyone would be able to share a room with Lexi who still screamed for hours most nights. Lexi's orthopedic doctor told us that she would soon need to have hip surgery because her legs were criss crossing and her hips were going out of socket. This would be a major surgery with several months of recovery where Lexi would be in a body cast, from her ribs to her toes. We were also trying to figure out how to get Lexi the increasing nutrition needed as she grew. She was not able to eat regular food and drinking a bottle was still slow going.

With all of these concerns there was a sense of rightness and acceptance with the pregnancy. I don't think there ever would have been a good or right time to have another baby with Lexi's needs. She has and will always require one on one 24 hour care. The choice of more kids was taken out of our hands and it shaped the direction the rest of our life would take.